A Mother's Prayer
by Eternity in Paris
Summary: "How dare you? How dare you leave me! How could you go and die and leave me here all alone! Please come back! I need you! Please come back!" "She risked her life everyday and she never thought about what would happen to me if she was gone! How could she think that I could live without her?" One-shot/Song-fic


_**So, I was feeling all down today from re-watching all the NCIS episodes where Jenny was still alive up to Judgment Day. And let me tell you, after all this time, it doesn't get any easier. My feels are all over the place. Rated T for cutting. I am not suggesting anything in this story okay?**_

_**Anyways, this is just a little one-shot. My take on what if Jenny and Gibbs had a daughter and how her daughter would've reacted to the news that she died. This is also a song-fic. The song was sung by Celine Dion. The song was included on the soundtrack for **__**Quest for Camelot**__** and a compilation album called **__**Miracles**__**. I do suggest listening to the song while reading this. I swear, while I was listening to it and thinking about the plot in my head, I almost started crying and would've looked like an idiot. The house was never burned! Just a little note.**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone from NCIS. I obviously don't own the magnificent song either. If only.**_

"_**How dare you? How dare you leave me! How could you go and die and leave me here all alone! Please come back! I need you! Please come back!" "She risked her life everyday and she never thought about what would happen to me if she was gone! How could she think that I could live without her?" ONE-SHOT/SONG-FIC**_

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**A Mother's Prayer**

_I pray you'll be my eyes_

_And watch her where she goes_

_And help her to be wise_

_Help me to let go_

It was a beautiful Sunday morning and most of the families were outside having brunch together after going to church. But across the busy town, men and women dressed in somber black outfits were gathering at the Arlington National Cemetery. It was the funeral of their beloved director. The first female director of an armed federal agency – Jenny Shepard. The NCIS agents walked along the side to find seats as the reporters waited for the arrival of the deceased director's family. Jenny was a very private person and did not talk that much about her family to the press. No one knew that Jenny still had living family members – not even the MCRT that she was closest to knew. When a black SUV arrived, the reporters shamelessly started snapping photos as the door opened. Jasmine and Jaden Shepard slowly walked to where the casket stood. Jasmine had an arm around her granddaughter and occasionally wiped the tears that would escape from her eyes. Gibbs watched as the two Shepard women stood on the other side of the casket, opposite them, surrounded by their bodyguards. He looked at the girl that couldn't be more than sixteen years old trying to control her tears and not cry in front of the people she doesn't even know. He kept on thinking how she reminded him of Kelly because of the red hair and blue eyes. But as he looked at her longer, she painfully resembled Jenny so much that he had to look away. He told himself that this was just another one of the funerals he had to attend. They were long over and she was the one that told him that there would be no 'off the job.' He thought back to when she gave him a photo of the two of them back when they were still partners – they were standing underneath the Eiffel Tower, his arm was around her and she was smiling up at him. He turned the photo and it said, '1996: We'll always have Paris.' That was their last time together before she packed up and left him with nothing but a 'Dear John' letter and a broken heart.

_Every mother's prayer_

_Every child knows_

_Lead her to a place_

_Guide her with your grace_

_To a place where she'll be safe_

"She was… _is_ a great person." Jaden tearfully said as she stood in front of the podium, "My mom never told anyone about her family because of the risks and she didn't want us getting hurt. Even if she's always busy, she always tried to find the time to talk to me and ask how my day was. On the day that she died, my grandma asked me to come down the stairs because she had to tell me something about my mom. I thought that maybe she either came home early or she had to extend her time in California. But never in a million years did I think that she was never coming back and that I would never see her again. I would never see her smile, never see her pretty green eyes, or hear her voice ever again. She has been my rock. She risked her life everyday to protect the ones that she love and care about. I know that you're in a better place now. I will miss you mom."

Jaden stepped away from the podium and smiled as Abby went up to her and hugged her.

"The director was a great person. I really loved her. Just know that she will always be watching over you."

"Thank you. We're you close to my mom?"

"You can say that." The goth smiled, "She was also like a mom to me."

"My condolences." Gibbs reached out and shook her hand.

"Thank you." Jaden shook his hand, "Are you Jethro Gibbs?"

"I am."

"It's good to finally meet you. My mom has told me so much about you."

"I hope nothing embarrassing." Gibbs joked, trying to lighten the mood.

"Nothing embarrassing, I guarantee. She just told me how you two were partners back in the day."

"She was a good agent. Still is actually." He smiled and shook hands with Jasmine as she stood next to her granddaughter. They all watched as the casket was lowered to the ground and the workers started dropping the soil on top. The NCIS agents slowly started dispersing and got in their SUV's to go back to the headquarters.

"These people," Tony started, "they don't really know your mom that well. Some of them are here for the gossip. Aren't you bothered by that?"

"There will always be people like that agent DiNozzo. You can't really change their personalities."

"How did you know who I am?"

"My mom has told me so much about the Major Case Response Team. She told me how you liked quoting movies so much." She smiled sadly at the now full grave.

"She was a great person. Everyone loved her. A lot of things will change." He looked at her.

"I know. C'est la vie." She patted his shoulder sadly and walked away to the waiting SUV where her grandmother stood.

"How did we not know that the director had a daughter?" McGee walked up to Tony.

"Well, we all have skeletons in our closet Timmy." Tony sighed and walked to the other direction where his car was parked and was closely followed by the others.

Gibbs was the last one that was left and he continued staring at the gravesite. **Jennifer Shepard. Mother, daughter, and friend. Toujours dans mon coeur. **"Why Jen?" He spoke directly to the tombstone. "Why did you have to die for me? I could've protected you… And the girl? Christ, she couldn't have been more than sixteen years old. How will she cope without you? I thought that you would always be there… First Shannon and Kelly. Now, you? Why do the people that I end up loving always leave me?" He whispered brokenly. He stood up and placed a white orchid on the soil. "Je t'aime Jen."

_I pray she finds your light_

_And holds it in her heart_

_As darkness falls each night_

_Remind her where you are_

"I barely had a chance to finish unpacking the stuff Gibbs. Let alone, processing it. With the funeral and all. I don't have anything for you." Abby sniffled.

"You will though."

"I will. And it will be my best work."

"Always is, Abs."

"It's different this time. This time, it's for the director. It would be my very best work." She stared at the shirt that Jenny was wearing when she was shot at the diner. The blue color stained with dried blood. Abby couldn't help but tear up again. Gibbs stared at the shirt and looked up at Abby's tearful expression.

"Gibbs…" She turned and hugged him tightly. "I try not to be sad."

"It's okay." He said as she pulled away.

"She was always a snappy dresser, you know? Like, classy. I… I never told her that!" She looked down at the floor. "Why didn't I tell her that? She would've liked that. She would've smiled. You can't wait with stuff like that." Abby continued to flail her arms around her for emphasis. "Because you never know what's gonna happen."

She sighed and looked at Gibbs, "I like the way you dress Gibbs! It's masculine and spruce. Always with a jacket."

Gibbs smiled and shook his head.

"See? Even you smiled." Abby wiped her tears. She diverted her attention by the door when the team started walking in. "Tony! You're all business but – after hours!" She hugged him tightly and pulled away when Ziva walked in next. "Ziva, you kick ass and you look so good doing it!"

McGee walked in last and Abby came barreling towards him, "McGee," She brushed the imaginary lint off of his shoulders, "oh, McGee…" She smiled and hugged him.

_Every mother's prayer_

_Every child knows_

_Need to find a place_

_Guide her to a place_

_Give her faith so she'll be safe_

"Agent Gibbs?" A woman's voice pulled his attention away from reading the report in his hands.

"Mrs. Shepard." He greeted, "What can I do for you?"

"I need your help with my granddaughter."

Gibbs looked at her incredulously. "Well, no offence Mrs. Shepard, but what do I have to do with your granddaughter?" He asked as he continued to ignore the nagging feeling in his gut.

"I am really sorry for not telling you sooner… But Jaden is your daughter."

Tony and McGee stopped typing their reports and stared at the lady with their mouths hanging open.

"No." Gibbs said, in denial. "If she was mine, Jenny would've told me!"

"She was only trying to protect her daughter!"

"Daughter… I don't have a daughter!"

"Agent Gibbs-"

"No! My daughter died more than twenty years ago! Kelly is the only daughter I have!"

"I hate to break it to you Agent Gibbs but you do have another daughter. And she needs your help!"

"I don't even know her! How do you expect me to help her?"

"I just… I just want you to talk to her. Tell her that you are her father and you'll be there for her." Jasmine sighed.

"Why do you even need my help in the first place?"

"She's not been coping well with the death of her mother. I know that it has been a while already but I think that her version of coping with Jenny's death is more… alternative."

"What do you mean?"

"I think that she has been cutting herself. I think that it's her way of escaping the pain of the loss of her mother… Please, Agent Gibbs. If not even for her, then for Jenny."

Gibbs sighed and ran his hand over his face tiredly. "I really don't know what to do Mrs. Shepard."

"If you change your mind, you know where to find us." She turned on her heel and walked away from the squad room.

A few nights later, Gibbs was sanding his latest boat and still thinking about is newly discovered daughter that he has yet to see when his phone rang. He put his tools down on the bench and looked at the caller. It was coming from the Shepard residence.

"Gibbs." He gruffly answered.

"Agent Gibbs!" A frantic Jasmine yelled through the speakers.

"What happened?" Gibbs asked running up the stairs and grabbing his car keys on the way.

"Jaden, she… I was coming to check up on Jaden and I found her here in the bathroom. She cut herself! I think the cut is too deep. She's unconscious and I can't get her to wake up!" Jasmine yelled, panic clear in her voice.

"Did you call an ambulance yet?" Gibbs balanced his phone between his shoulder and head as he swerved through traffic and ignored the honking cars behind him.

"I already did but I don't think they would get here on time!"

The tires screeched on the pavement as Gibbs arrived at the house in record time and sprinted inside and up the stairs. Jaden was lying on the floor looking pale and lifeless while Jasmine was holding her wrist- trying to stop the bleeding.

"Open the car door. I'll take her" He ordered her as he knelt down on the floor and scooped his daughter up. He started flashing back to when he arrived at the diner and saw the pool of blood with Jenny's name written on a card on the floor. He shook his head and ran down the stairs to his car. He placed her in the back seat with her grandmother and ran to the driver's side and sped off to the hospital.

After a couple of hours, the doctor came out and asked for her family.

"You are her…?" The doctor looked at Gibbs.

"Father." Gibbs answered right away and Jasmine eyed him warily.

"We were able to stop the bleeding and we wrapped up the cut. We gave her pain killers for it and she can actually go home tonight too. But make sure someone watches her."

"Thanks." Gibbs nodded and walked off to the room. He stepped inside the sterile white room and looked at the teenager sitting on the bed staring at her wrist. "Why did you do it?"

Jaden looked up, "That's none of your business."

"It is my business."

"No. You're not my father. You have no business being here."

"Actually, I am." He stood in front of her and glared.

"How do you even know that?"

"Your grandmother told me. Plus, we have the same eyes."

She looked up and stared at the similar blue eyes – refusing to believe that the man standing in front of her was the father that she has been waiting for.

"Why did you do it?" Gibbs changed the subject and pointed to the bandages.

"It numbs my anger at Ziva."

"Why are you angry at her?"

"She didn't save my mom! That's why! She let her die in that diner!" Jaden yelled. "I don't understand why she wasn't able to save her! Was she tired of saving my mom because she already saved her life once back in Cairo?"

"No." Gibbs shook his head.

"What?"

"You're not mad at Ziva."

"How would you even know?" Her voice getting higher. "You were never there!"

"Never there? Hell, I didn't even know about you!"

"And whose fault was that?" She accused him.

"Come on!" Gibbs pulled her out of bed and dragged her down the hallway.

"Agent Gibbs!" Jasmine yelled after them. "Where are you taking her?"

"To where she's really angry at!" He yelled back and tightened his grip on her arm when she tried to pull away.

He got her in the car and drove off. He drove for about twenty minutes and Jaden was about to fall asleep when the car suddenly stopped.

"Where are we?" She asked, anger still clear in her voice. Gibbs didn't say anything. Instead, he told her to get out of the car with him and they walked towards a grassy area.

"We're at Arlington National Cemetery." Gibbs said.

She stopped in her tracks and glared at him. "Take me home. Now."

"No." He snapped at her. She tried to walk back to the car but he held on to her arm and pulled her towards the spot with the shiny tombstone. "You're not really angry at Ziva."

"Excuse me?"

"You're not angry at Ziva." He repeated. "Or at me either."

"You don't know anything!"

"It's alright to be angry at her…" Gibbs whispered. "When my first wife died along with my daughter, I was angry." He confessed.

Jaden continued to say nothing and just glared at him.

"I was angry for a long time. It felt really painful. I was alone and it hurt. The pain never really goes away. It will always be there… But it gets numb a little." He put his hand on her shoulder. "I know she loves you. She didn't mean to leave you the way she did."

He watched as Jaden's breathing got more labored and she suddenly yelled, "How dare you!" Gibbs thought that she was yelling at him again and was about to speak when he realized that her attention was directed towards the ground.

Jaden fell in her knees and started hitting the tombstone with her fists, "How dare you leave me! How could you go and die and leave me here all alone! Please come back! I need you! Please come back!"

Gibbs knelt down beside her, "It's alright. Let it all out… Everything's gonna be okay."

"She risked her life everyday and she never thought about what would happen to me if she was gone! How could she think that I could live without her?"

"I'm here for you…" Gibbs whispered. "I know I missed out on many things, but I'm here now. And I won't go anywhere… I loved Jenny very much – I still do."

"I miss her so much."

"Me too, ma fille." Gibbs hugged his daughter, "Always."

_Lead her to a place_

_Guide her with your grace_

_To a place where she'll be safe_

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_**C'est la vie: That's life**_

_**Toujours dans mon coeur: Always in my heart**_

_**Je t'aime: I love you**_

_**Ma fille: My daughter**_

_**So…? What do you guys think? I honestly don't know if it was sad enough or something. I really pictured it different in my head. I am not really sure if I get mixed reviews for this. There are some people that aren't really fans of their favorite characters having kids but I don't really think that Gibbs would react the way Jaden did. Anyways, I tried my best. Please review my story (: you know you want to.**_


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